Negative Thinking

I sit all lot trying to condense the things I don't want to do or that I have to do so that I have time to write. Im obsessed with the idea really. I'm so overwhelmed with this story. Connections happen daily that make me feel I'm on some super natural wave. I feel debilitating pressure most of the time. all of life gets in the way of writing this. But if I truly believe that this story was given to me to tell, I must then believe that whom ever gave it to me felt strongly that I could manage it. I doubt this daily as well....Its this constant time sucking argument I have. Neglecting my children, my husband, my friends what if it's never read. What if it doesn't mean anything and is not really important? Blahg......If I did not argue with myself debating and configing my precious time I would actually have more time. So knowing that why do I still feel the need to blog my issues. I want to be authentic. I want this process to be the truth. I want others to relate to how difficult our goals can be to achieve. I also spend all lot of time on others blogs....truthfully I'm a bit tired of the ultra "you can do it....you are a goddess" mentality out there. Don't get me wrong. I'm inspired constantly but I think I would appreciate a bit of truth and reality mixed in... you know the real road to your dream process. So I will attempt to be truthful here so you don't feel alone when you want to smack all the perfect blogging success stories.  So easy just do this and this and this and then you are a famous person with thousands of followers. I feel most of these blogs are done by women who don't have other jobs and could possibly be a bit self centered and egomeniacal. Remember ladies that we are probably more average then we'd like to imagine and that is great too. I'm not saying don't go for the great beautiful blog building thing, just remember you are human and probably a mom and a wife and a good friend with another job and can't just whip it together like it seems others can. (That was me talking to me!) I so want too but I can only do one thing (no I really mean 5 things) at a time. But my latest solution.......for my birthday my friend got me a Crock Pot....