Blurred Lines

Is this heart  tied or supported? Is it old and worn out or weathered and full of depth? Is it trapped or just suspended in its own comfortable surroundings? Can we tell it's story by it's imperfections? If it were plump and shiny would you be more attracted to it? There are so many ways of seeing.

Just beyond

I stopped for a picture and just beyond this point is where I found the package apparently meant for me.

Collage Tag Found

This tag was attached to the odd looking stack of hand painted journal pages, I found as I trekked by camel back, through the coral sands of the Wadi Rum desert. They were wrapped  tightly together by a strange luminescent fabric and a red string. The sun caught a corner, as it peeked through the endless rolls of bellowing dunes, and a sharp ray of light pierced by eye with a direct, purposeful stab. I carefully unwrapped the mysterious package, from another world, as if it were the last present on Christmas morning.  


A Broken Wing Mixed Media Painting

Another mixed media painting came together today. Although I never feel finished  I felt to birth her now. I do not know how she broke her wing yet...I'm sure I will get the message at some point.



I grabbed this off of the renegade channel called TheSansarian on Youtube. Here is the link to "The Sansarian" Channel where you can find more of "her" making her art journal pages. Yes the ones that will be in the book, illustrating the story. You see, along with magically finding these journal pages from the future, I was allured on to this channel aswell, where again she has been telling me her story. It is a funny transmission and when I contacted Youtube and asked them where it was coming from they couldn't tell me. They said this was the only channel that has come in on waves that are of a chaotic nature. What ever that meant.


Mysterious Paper

There is something curious about old dress patterns. Reminds me of my mother who sewed all my clothes until I was eleven and revolted. They are secret papers really not handled much by the men of the family. If these beige, delicate, transparent papers were to be found thousands of years from now, they would look awfully mysterious. Are they directions to a buried treasure possibly? It must be some ancient code accessible only by those who have passed down the key. I suppose it would tell us, to go both ways, and that the number seven was very important. It would be a great place to hide some womens secrets don't you think. Ponder this and take notes. There are more things to discover about Sansaria's world.

If there ever was a reason to write...

I've thought from day one that I am simply "the receiver" of this idea for the novel.. Now I can't find an explanation for what has happened. On Jan 24, 2010 I was in Ma'in, Jordan, in a cave, in a hot springs hearing stories about mythological women. We were to choose one that we felt most connected to. I didn't know many so our guide told me a story about Inanna. I thought she sounded pretty good so I said Okay I will be her. I remember thinking I wish there was one that was a little more on the creative side. For the rest of the trip and continuing emails they refer to me as Inanna.  When I got home from my trip I started to read all my old notes that I have been writing for about 7 years and haven't looked at for three and a half. (in reference to this story that Ive been trying to write.) Now this is about 40 pages and scraps of paper to go through and it looks kind of like a crazy womens wall paper. Under the Arab continent for the "message carrier" I had written Inanna. Mind you this was three 1/2 years ago and I have extensive research on seven other continents. Have no idea where it came from but lets say for the sake of argument I saw a program on TV about this Goddess of the Earth and Sky and just simply scribbled it in. The weird part is that why was this the only Goddess story that my guide in Jordan told me. Do you know how many there are? Then why did I choose it without a strong feelings attached to it. Two weeks  later when I'm reading more of my notes, I see her name again and she is the only name that is mentioned in all of my notes besides the main characters and she ends up winning  this challenge and becomes "the universal creator"of my entire story. Why wouldn't I have remember this very important name? How could it be an unfathomable coincident that there are to absolute conditions to this connection. This is impossible to explain and has given me the "power" and "purpose" to finish this apparently very important book. Kind of creepy... or as we say "synchronistic". Apparently we are being guided, which funny enough is what my book is about.

Art Travel Journal of Jordan

Dumuzid and Inanna

More pages!!

The Journey to Jordan's Art Journal


Joy in their eyes.

The Bediun People touched me more than I can express. My son said they are all so charismatic.They have no material objects...really non that I could see... not even an extra set of clothing. It changes your view on everything.We imagine ourselves with nothing and we could never be that satisfied. But we are never satisfied either way. I gave them drawings of themselves which I thought they would cherish. They did for a moment and then the drawing had no value and was soon in the dirt. No one had more or less. They just shared goats, and feed and tea. They baby sat each others kids and everyone had their jobs to make the day work. As the older sister road the donkey side saddle up the mountain for the nights water supply I watched a local game of jumping of the highest rock. So much laughter.The school near by has been up and running for ten years now. I wonder if their culture will now die out in the name of progress... the complexities of this they are not familiar with. 50% took the homes that were built for them in the lowlands. The other 50% refused to change their nomadic life style in the hills and the tents. The Eco Lodge is a equal part in this community. Support Eco Lodges every chance you get a chance. Its the way it really should be. Sharing!

Wisdom in Five Generations

Our guides family has gone from "can neither read nor write" to the first women governor in one generation. Jordan is moving fast and the progress amazing. Everywhere you turn growth and new suburbs. Many systems of the government also helping the Palestinians relocate from Israel. Beach resorts and schools being built everywhere you turn. There is such a peace about this place.

The Veil ...sacred beauty.

My Goddess name is Inanna

Here in the cave sauna under this waterfall pool we got our goddess names.Mine full of light and dark...wanting to bridge a gap between worlds. Not afraid and very adventurous. Creating beauty and new ways of seeing... I found her fitting..maybe as a muse to Sansaria.

Soleme danced for John the Baptist Head

Artemis Temple

Jerashian Waiter

Temple of Artemis in Jerash, Jordan



Temple of Hercules
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chrisian church.jpg

Christian church next to Mosque.
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The King Abdullah bin Al Hussein Mosque of thr Matter.
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Our guide through Jordan on the right. Lana Nassar and the girls went to Turkish bath today and then to her parents home where we met her wise Palestinian Aunt and her mom who is the first women govenern. We ate a traditional Jordanian m eal called Mansaf which the mother prepared the modern way by running over the dried yogurt balls with the car. The funny thing was, I thought I was making a joke when Lana asked "your not going to believe how she breaks up the balls the "modern" way. " I said running them over with a car. I just guessed it and we all laughed like old friends.
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What Im interested in doing.

For the next eight months I will be trying to complete a novel. I have never wanted to be a writer which makes this alittle interesting. I was drawing these costumes and I thought it might be interesting to imagine what clothes might look like in the future...way in the future. As I spent time night after night relaxing and drawing I couldnt stop creating their world around them. As a teacher I naturally think about how to effect the children? How can I teach them to see more? How can I prepare them for their future? What are they going to need? What is truely important? Then Sansaria said  "I can show them". She said "give me a life and I can show them! The drawing didnt really speak at least not audibly but in my head. Well, apparently she is very very stubborn and wont leave. She's been there for about seven years now workin out the finest of details and now  I feel somewhat ill prepared for her birth.
A girl friend of mine listened to my story and thought I could use a "Sacred Women's Journey" to commemorate and somewhat facilitate her exit from my brain and on to paper... hence the trip to Jordan. Somewhat creepy timeing with my gradschool studies starting... which incorporates a Self Designed Writing Science Fiction class and a Mythology and Women class.
Now, hang in there we are almost finished. Since I am an art teacher and an artist we cannot deny the need for visual understanding. So in Jordan I will meeting and organizing a cultural exchange between two high school art classes. The product of this colaboration will then be exhibited in the MOCADA Brooklyn NY.
So this blog is where Im going to make sence of all this. Im going to first cleanse my body, mind and spirit.Then Im going to make some space in my head so Sansaria can stretch her legs a little.
 See... what you don't know is the novel is all about girl power. You know simply speaking...girls needing to go back through time and make some changes so the universe runs on the track of survival. The mission of this book is to show young women that intuition can be inspired by many magical things and if you listen. the smallest decision could change the course of history.Thats all I'm gonna give ya right now though.

Another one of Sansaria's friends.

Sansaria has two really close friends Orianna and Beannette. Everyone in the future has various shades of brown skin with features of the seven continents.There clothing is Future Indigenous.


Notice her white hair...she is about 11 here with a very old soul.
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This is where it all started. I was just doing some drawings of some future ancient drawings and they started to come alive.
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The adventure begins.....A trip to Jordan.

In preparation I will be creating a daily art journal page. Here is the old baby's book I spray gessoed in preparation.
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